Chicken thief couldn’t recognise bird

Excerp from The Star Online:

[IPOH: A man who admitted to stealing a chicken got amused looks in a magistrate’s court here when he could not recognise the same bird brought to him for identification.

Contract worker R. Maran, 29, was asked to identify the bird after pleading guilty to stealing the 1.5kg cockerel from a coop in Hala Perindustrian Menglembu 13, here, on Oct 10.

However, when owner carried the chicken into the magistrate’s court yesterday, Maran un­expectedly denied that the black bird with brown chest feathers was the one he had stolen.

“What? You think it has been switched?” asked prosecuting officer Asst Supt Jamaluddin Osman to chuckles from the public gallery. ]

> Read more here

Hahaha, I think this is the funniest court case I've heard ever, this year! Poor guy got jailed for 3 months for the crime. But still! My god, don't you think it's hilarious that they have to present the chicken for identification?! Perhaps they the prosecutor should get the CSI to get involve.

Drunk Presidents

I wonder why our economy is going down?

Nicolas Sarkozy



President Bush

Nokia N97

Arghh! Damn you Nokia, I haven't got hold of the N96 and already coming out with N97?!

But there's no doubt with the recent announcement of N97 at the Nokia World 2008 Conference, N97 is superb!

Again if you're an N90s owner, you'll know the All-in-one features that the have, N-Game gaming platform, Music Player, Video player, Music store, Nokia Maps & Full HTML web browser with Flash Player capability. It's also fitted with slide out full QWERTY keyboard, 5 Megapixels camera, 32GB onboard with 16GB expanded memory.

The quad-band (GSM 850/900/1800/1900) world phone is HSDPA-capable handset, but it currently supports only the 900/1900/2100MHz bands (AT&T's 3G network runs on 850/1900MHz, while T-Mobile runs on 1700/2100MHz). There is integrated Wi-Fi and Bluetooth, however.

Oh yeah, the best thing is it's a touchscreen! I guess Nokia is trying to compete with its rival the Apple Iphone, which this year has topped the mobile touchscreen arena.

Nympho

Theoretically with nymphos you have nothing but sex. Good long damn good sex. You feel like you are in a porno movie. 

Dangers And Potential Risks Of A Nympho

If a male being is temporarily not able to satisfy her needs for the moment, the nympho simply takes the next one. But don't bother too much, because if she finishes him, she will come back to you oh great warrior of love. You do not lose much, in fact you need some pause to rehydrate.

Natural Occurence

Unfortunately nymphos are very rare and it is very hard to detected one at first sight, but there are two scientificly proven and statistically confirmed indicators where nymphos occure:

• If you are located in place A, the nymphos are to be found in place B. Which means if you are unhappily married to your wife for 15 years and more and/but still are with her, you definitely are not married to a nympho. No matter what she is trying to tell you.
  
  
• If you are located in place A, the nympho may be found in your direct nearness, like your neighbour's girlfriend for example, but that is certainly likely still too far away for you. If you allow yourself a serious and objective look around, absolutely all of your friends and neighbours have relationships with nymphos, and you are the only one without. But with marriage you have conciuosly set your priorities towards a tendentially calm and quiet life anyway, so you feel happy for them and are not envious in any way and that is a good life too. 
  

Natural Appearance And Characteristics

The nympho is rather unobstrusive and of average looks, but definitely not ugly. Nobody would guess from her looks that she was given this fantastic, and breathtaking gift. That is also why there are almost no nymphos to be found on television and cinema, well that and the fact that they are always too busy.

Nymphos do not show off how many sexual partners or/and sex they have had. They would never even get the idea of being a nympho. Women who tell you they are nymphos are usually only a pretender and in fact a dissapointment. They are finished after only the third time (a natural non-nympho will be ready for at least seven unless you are hideously ugly) and fall asleep. A real nympho is ready all the time, anywhere and anyway.

Cure for women

There is only one known cure for women: Sleeping with the lovable Carmine. Of course there is a 90 percent chance of death by doing this. 

Information via Uncyclopedia